The Punchbowl Must Be Spiked & other Baby Shower Etiquette

If your kids live nearby and you expect that your new grandchild will be visiting often you’ll need many of the same baby items at your house. These products are expensive. A forward thinking Grandma Boomer solves this dilemma by registering for identical presents.

Guests may wonder if the mom-to-be is expecting twins, but a simple note on the invitation equating a baby shower to a private cabaret or a comedy club will make the concept of double gifts sound as natural as a two drink minimum.

Requesting guests to bring you gifts not only saves you money, but it serves another purpose. Since baby showers are traditionally a surprise, if some big mouth slips up and blabs about the shower to your daughter or daughter-in-law, she’ll still get to experience a surprise when you begin to open your presents. Fingers crossed that a quick thinker will capture her expression on video.

If  you’re like me you find it impossible to be in a room full of cackling women without smirking and whispering to the woman next to you, “Look at that woman over there sitting on the loveseat. What was she thinking when she put that on this morning?”

If you’re like me you’ve made the unfortunate choice to be talking to the woman’s sister. Now you have to pretend that you meant the woman next to her even though you both know what you’re full of.

It’s because of exchanges like this one that the punchbowl is spiked. As you may have figured out, I’m not a fan of showers.  (unless, of course, it’s for me!) On the other hand, even though no one orders punch in a restaurant,  any excuse to get buzzed at one o’clock in the afternoon can’t be all bad.

This is part of a chapter from a book of essays I’m writing called,  “Some Kids Peak in Nursery School & other Wisecracks from a Grandma Boomer.”  Please let me know if you’d want to read further…thanks! 



5 Responses

  1. Carol says:

    Yes! Funny! I wanna read more!

  2. You suck, Carol! Not even a little bit funny!

  3. Amy Blocher says:

    I liked this post a lot, Carol!!!
    You’re wonderful!!!!

  4. Carol Scibelli says:

    Thanks Am! That means a lot to me coming from you, a published author and a Grandma Boomer!

  5. Off-beat funny. A unique “Sex in the City” voice throughout. Love it!

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